Lose Yourself to Find Yourself - Kim Marie Coaching

Lose Yourself to Find Yourself

In this time when our sun is astronomically in the constellation of Aries (until May 15th), we are experiencing the in-streaming, energetic forces of new beginnings. We see it blatantly in the burgeoning spring for those of us in the northern hemisphere, but how might we see it less obviously, such as within ourselves?

First, we must take a look at what a new beginning really is. New beginnings come with an implied ending. As the seeds are sprouting, the seed form “dies” in order to become something new. As the blossoms of Spring begin to wilt, they make way for the developing fruits of Autumn.  Life is a cycle of endings and beginnings. So, in order for us to connect with new beginnings, we must also accept the endings that are necessary to make way for what wishes to be birthed.

As we seek to go deeper within our being to discover our true selves, we must sacrifice the parts of us that do not express or represent our true selves. For many of us, this is a scary and unwelcome task. Yet this is the very task, the task of letting go, that we must face in order to make room for what is asking to bloom.

How do we let go, and maintain some semblance of self?

In order to move along the path toward embodying our best selves, we must cultivate a combination of devotion to something greater, as well as self-confidence. In devotion, we humbly acknowledge that we cannot go it alone. There is a force greater than we are that guides us, and is calling the shots in ways we can only scarcely begin to understand.

At the same time, we are calling upon the strength of our Highest Self, the part of us that knows who we are, and how to express that in the world. While there may be a Great Mystery at play that we don’t understand and we can devote ourselves to, we must not lose ourselves to the idea that what we aspire to become is outside of ourselves. We have the power within to realize our highest potential, and must balance our sense of devotion to something greater with this inner confidence and strength.

In other words, you must lose yourself to find yourself.

You must let go of all that you think you are, all the stories, beliefs, preconceptions, emotions, and labels, and this requires a deep devotion to something greater than you as you show up in this moment. Without this devotion, how else can you trust that what you aspire to become will emerge? At the same time, you must know that this “something greater” is a force that moves through you when allowed to, and guides you to show up in your fullness. You alone can find yourself. No one can define you or decide for you what you are to be or do in this lifetime. You have the capacity to confidently say no to those assessments you do not wish to make a part of you, and move forth in the authenticity of who you are.

We are living in a time of awakening consciousness. Lots of new age gobbledygook out there makes it seem like this is all about focusing on the good and experiencing sudden enlightenment or rapture. Kudos to those who may have experienced things in this way, but in my world, this is not how consciousness awakens. In my world, awakening consciousness is hard work!

Enlightenment is not a moment, but a process. It is an endless journey of the soul.

Consciousness awakens only with our own effort. No one can do it for us. It cannot happen without a purification or cleansing process. It does not happen overnight or with some flash of light. We hear stories of the Buddha coming to his “moment of enlightenment” under the Bodhi tree, but in reality, this “moment” was preceded by significant struggle and suffering, and who knows how many lifetimes of this.

In order to lose our small self to find our Higher Self, we must be devoted enough to stay true to that Higher Self, without becoming subservient to something other than that. We must be confident enough to walk our own unique path, while not becoming arrogant and self-involved. We can do this by learning, yet not losing ourselves to organizations, gurus or institutions.  We can do this by sharing our gifts with others, selflessly offering them in service as we discover them.

We are all on this journey together, searching at our own pace, in our own way. As we each individually find our True Selves, we can then draw forth the True Selves in others.

As we let go of our old, smaller self, we give permission for others to do the same. As we heal ourselves, those around us heal. I cannot count the number of times I have witnessed significant changes in my children’s experiences simply because of the inner work I do for myself.

What will it take for you to be devoted to the knowing of this Higher Potential you have access to? What is holding you back from having the confidence to express yourself authentically? What is the worst that could happen if you were to give up the old stories and embody new ones?

These are the questions we must ask ourselves if we are to experience the new beginnings we are longing for. As women and mothers, we often lose ourselves to so many other people and tasks. What will it take to lose yourself to your Self? Can you give your Self the stillness and attention required to allow it to nourish you?

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